POWER COUPLE: Talk about money to partner. Pic by: Jasmine Carter Pexels
IT’S Valentine’s Day this week, the perfect time to get a STD – which in this case stands for sexually transmitted debt.
Sadly, I have seen people take out loans to buy expensive gifts for their partners (within and outside of marriage).
In some cases, they will even going as far as buying homes and vehicles and registering them in the partner’s name.
Then when they break up, the partner leaves the relationship with alles – that fancy car, the house. The lot!
Can you imagine struggling to pay off a house or car your ex is enjoying with their new love? Or paying off your credit cards and personal loans (often for around five years) taken out for romantic dinners and trips with someone who has moved onto “the new love of their life”.
If you are in a relationship, take this the time to have a truthful conversation about your debt, credit report, overall relationship, and view on money, especially if you plan on tying the knot.
Sarfaraaz Hamza, CEO of ezDebt says that the lack of communication in marriages is particularly evident when people seek debt management options.
He adds that when a couple realises that they are struggling with their debt and approach a registered debt counsellor, it is vitally important that they are brutally honest about their finances, especially their expenses and their debt.
Hamza explains: “Often, we find that one party in the marriage is not fully aware of how much the other has been spending.
“When all the cards [and spending] are laid on the table, it can make an already tense situation even worse.”
“I therefore highly recommend that couples make the time and the effort to have conversations around their finances part of their marriage, and even before they tie the knot.
“Should they run into trouble further down the line – their honesty and open communication with stand them in good stead.”
John Manyike, Head of Financial Education at Old Mutual, said that there are several reasons why couples should discuss their financial situation.
He reckons: “Just like any team, couples need to be on the same page about their financial goals, whether they are buying a home, saving for a vacation, or planning for retirement.
“This helps the couple work together towards common dreams and goals.
“Discussing financial situations helps couples avoid misunderstandings, as money is a common cause of disagreement.
“So when you openly discuss your finances, you can avoid misunderstandings and build trust.
“Discussing financial situations also helps with budgeting because it creates a certain level of transparency in how couples budget and how they can better their budget.”
Manyike also offers tips to help couples manage their finances and practice good money habits.
Set goals
Your financial goals and those of your partner’s need to be in line with one another, as you both as a couple should be working towards these financial goals.
Budget
When you are clear on what you are contributing to then you will have to agree on a system that works.
A lot of couples do not discuss these things and things are just assumed and you end up arguing.You should also discuss and decide on bank accounts and the bank that you want to go with.
Open communication
Couples must learn to communicate openly. You need to ensure that you and your partner talk about money openly as a couple.
When you discuss your financial goals and your spending habits, you have a clear communication and understanding which will allow you to build a strong financial partnership.
Treat your relationship as a partnership and that partnership extends to the topic of finances.
Money meetings
You need to schedule regular meetings as a couple and discuss the issue of money.
It should not be an accidental conversation. You must plan and agree that on a set time in the month when finances are discussed. Couples should discuss things like wills, so they have proper planning and talk about life cover if someone passes away.
Don’t let the idea of romantic, happily-ever-after, love stop you from thinking logically about your finances and making conversations around money part of your relationship.
The sooner, the better.
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